


I'll let you be the voice of my heart

by DylansLittlePrincess



Series: lashton drabbles [2]
Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Bullying, Depression, High School AU, M/M, Michael doesn't play football but he's popular as well, but they become better, calum and michael are jerks sorry, football! calum, football! luke, i use both football and soccer, popular! luke, upopular! Ashton
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-09
Updated: 2014-12-09
Packaged: 2018-02-28 15:39:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2737868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DylansLittlePrincess/pseuds/DylansLittlePrincess
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>And suddenly, Luke realizes that all the older boy needed was a friend but he once again managed to mess that up like he always does.</p><p>or, in which things get complicated after two boys of different status quo's start to become friends and more during early morning conversations over a soiled desk.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'll let you be the voice of my heart

**Author's Note:**

> I decided in apology for how inactive I am, I'm going to try and post 25 oneshots before christmas or if i cant achieve that, before december. This one is rushed and not my best but I hope you all like it :) i'll try to edit later as some lines refuse to be paragraphed :D

The school is completely empty by the time Luke walks in. Usually, after early morning football practice with Calum, Calum would drag Luke to starbucks for them to 'chill' and have some 'bro-time' but as Michael had chosen to show up for their practice this morning, Calum forgot all about 'bro-time' and he couldn't have been off that pitch faster immediately coach blew his whistle.

Luke had thought about going back home to shower before getting into bed but he doubts his mother would be pleased to see him arrive all sweaty and disgusting so he opts to shower in school and figures that he might as well arrive for homeroom early and save himself a detention when he was done.

It turns out he underestimates just how early it is. The school currently resembles a scene from a low-budget horror movie, all silent and somewhat spooky. Luke decides to walk to class quickly and doesn't waste any time bursting into his homeroom and going straight to his seat at the front of the class where his teacher placed him due to the fact she wants to keep an eye on him as he's apparently 'easily distracted'.

Luke is heading for the seat when out of the corner of his eye, he notices black scribbles all over the desk next to him. The desk belongs to Ashton Irwin who Luke is sure must be the oldest student in their school. Luke and Ashton have been sitting together since the beginning of the semester but Luke has never said one single word to the other boy, mostly because Ashton never really talks to anyone and Luke is always doing his best to try and actually concentrate on class instead of talking to anyone but he knows about Ashton. It’s always been weird to him that Ashton is repeating his junior year for the second time even though he seems to be brilliant at everything but maths. Luke's mum Liz told him that even though Ashton wasn't the best at math, he was still a good kid.

Taking a closer look, Luke realises the black scribbles all over Ashton's desk are words. Things like retard and moron and kill yourself were hastily written in huge bold black letters all over Ashton's desk. Luke's eyes widened as he took them in. He isn't friends with Ashton but the things written on the desk make something twinge in his chest. He doesn't hesitate to go to the bathroom and get a wet napkin to use to clean everything off.

When the door to the class opens, Luke is too busy scrubbing off the black ink to notice anything until Ashton is directly in front of him and he suddenly finds himself staring straight into a pair of anxious green eyes.

Ashton's eyes widen in confusion when he sees the soiled napkin in Luke's hand and Luke rushes to speak before Ashton can accuse him of anything, ''It wasn't me. I was just trying to scrub it off.''

Ashton is silent for a minute before he gives a hesitant smile at Luke and Luke suddenly feels his heart constrict when he realises the older boy has dimples and says, ''I know. You're one of the nice ones.''  
  
''Err, I'm Luke.'' Luke is surprised when he suddenly finds himself tongue-tied. He usually isn't the most outgoing or flirty guy but he's popular and good at talking and relating to others. He isn't sure why he's suddenly becoming shy because of a boy in a baggy blue sweater. ''But you probably know that, I mean, we sit next to each other.''

Ashton just goes slightly red at this and ducks his head but Luke can still tell he's blushing from the bright red tips in his ears. The thought that he's adorable suddenly pops into Luke's head and Luke internally shakes it out. It is so not a good idea to think of someone like Ashton as adorable. Not because he's a guy as their school is mostly lax about things like that (Michael and Calum are dating and they're both really popular) but because no one talks to Ashton. Luke doesn't like how people are mean to Ashton but he somehow understands why. Ashton is weird with his odd baggy sweaters and tiny packed lunches and how he's the only one to ever repeat a grade not once but twice. He also never really talks to anyone and this singles him apart from the rest of them. No one wants to be friends or even associate with him due to all of this and along with the fact that Michael and Calum, the most popular boys in school, absolutely loathe him.

Luke isn't proud to admit how his best friends are the two biggest bullies in school. Michael is forever tripping Ashton in the hallways and leaving mean notes in his locker. Ashton had to stop eating lunch in the cafeteria after the first week as Michael had made it clear that anyone who sat with older boy would be targeted by him and Calum as well. Luke hates all the bullying and unkindness but he can't say or do anything about it as Michael and Calum wouldn't hesitate to turn on him if he did. Luke used to be unpopular for the first few weeks of high school and he was bullied pretty badly for being into weird music and not really fitting in with the other kids until Calum, the school soccer star, saw how fast he was when he ran and realised the soccer potential in him and invited him to join the team. After that, everything improved really quickly. He started to get good grades, people started to want to talk to him and his popularity grew from there. Calum also took Luke under his wing and they became good friends. It took Michael a longer time to stop hating Luke but once Luke proved himself to Michael, they became fast friends as well. Calum and Michael were great when they were your friends but the worst enemies to have and unfortunately, Ashton was the target of their taunts.

''Thank you.'' Ashton whispers suddenly, he shyly raises his head so his eyes can meet Luke and Luke can't help but think the older boy looks pretty with his flushed cheeks and bright eyes. ''For helping. You're a really nice guy.''

''It’s alright, mate.'' Luke says awkwardly. ''It's no big deal.''

Ashton's eyes go as large as saucers and Luke can just tell he's thinking about how that must be the nicest anyone has been to him. Luke isn't surprised that the older boy doesn't say this aloud. His eyes say it all.

Before Luke can say anything more, Mrs Clemensworth comes into the class holding up a box of doughnuts and a tray of coffee. She smiles brightly when she sees the two boys,' ‘It’s great to see you're so early. Would you two please be darlings and help me distribute this to all the teachers desks?''

''Sure.'' Luke says instantly, anxious to get on her good side. 

Ashton nods without looking straight at her and together, the two boys help her to share out snacks for the teacher in school

*

The first meeting turns out to be something that neither Luke nor Ashton suspect. The day after that, Luke decides to go to class early again instead of going home and he's met once again with the sight of Ashton’s desk marred with rude things. He doesn't hesitate to grab the napkins and start to wipe. This time, when Ashton comes in while Luke is wiping, the two boys start to talk. Its’ only a brief conversation but its a start. From that day, Luke and Ashton start to talk every day and get close. Luke finds out things about the other boy like how Ashton loves GreenDay and is good at writing stories. Luke also finds out about Ashton's family and how he used to love to play the drums until his drum teacher, his mum's boyfriend Warwick, left them and took the drum set with him.

Their talking never lasts more than before school hours at first until about two weeks after they first start talking when Luke builds up the courage to ask Ashton if he would like to hang out together after school. 

At first, Ashton is surprised and wary but quickly agrees when he realises that Luke is being truly sincere. They decide to meet at the library downtown, a nice place to hang out. Luke doesn't want to go to a movie or a coffee shop as he knows that Ashton isn't rich or even well off as his family can't even afford school meals and Ashton has to bring his food from home. Luke isn't very rich either as his mum is an accountant turned math teacher and he isn't really sure what his dad does exactly but he's definitely more well off than Ashton and wouldn't mind paying for the older boy. The only thing that stops him from doing so is the knowledge that Ashton would probably get the wrong idea and be upset as he would think that Luke views him as a charity case or feels sorry for him. So Luke decides to be on the safe side and arrange their meeting in a place fun place that doesn't require any money.

It ends up being extremely fun. Luke doesn’t like books or reading but Ashton’s excitement is contagious. He turns out to be a completely different person when he’s surrounded by books and out of school. Each time he finds a new read, he turns to Luke with this freaking huge smile on his face and his dimples showing and Luke thinks he’s so done when he hears the older boy giggle. Ashton’s giggle is loud, somewhat nerdy and completely adorable. The minute Luke hears it, he knows he’s fallen hard and it takes all his concentration to push that scary thought out of his head.  
Once Ashton is done browsing through all the books, Luke takes Ashton to the lake. Its always been his favourite place to just go and get away from everything. That’s how he feels with Ashton. Like he’s escaped from all the pressure of the world and he’s free from judgement and to just be himself. They sit on the boardwalk with their feet hanging off from it. Halfway during Ashton excitedly telling him about one of his favourite books, Luke pretends to slip off the boardwalk and falls into the lake. When Ashton ducks worriedly, Luke suddenly stretches and pulls him into the lake as well. By this time, both of them are in a fit of giggles and Luke suddenly can’t resist the urge to kiss Ashton any longer. So he does.

And Ashton kisses back.  
*  
It all falls apart during lunch the next day. Luke is sitting at the popular table with Calum and Michael as usual when Calum suddenly says, ‘’I think we should give Irwin that present we planned today.’’

‘’What do you mean?’’ Luke says worriedly. He knows Calum and Michael and anything they had for Ashton could never be good.

‘’Chill,’’ Michael grins slyly in response. ‘’We just want to offer him some food as we know he doesn't have much.’’

Luke still can’t help the bad feeling growing in his stomach when Calum invites Ashton to their table. As usual, Ashton is sweet and non-judgmental so he accepts their invitation graciously and smiles at Luke when he gets there, which makes Luke realize that he probably thinks Luke is behind this.

It doesn’t go that badly at first, Calum and Michael behave somewhat civilly but this ends immediately Michael asks Ashton whether he would like some spaghetti. When Ashton nods, Michael’s grin widens significantly and to Luke’s horror, he dumps his plate of spaghetti and Bolognese sauce on the floor.

‘’Here,’’ Michael’s smile is innocent but his gleaming eyes are anything but. ‘’I know you aren’t used to plates and all.’’

Time seems to freeze for a moment as Ashton’s eyes suddenly widen in hurt and confusion and he looks at Luke with these huge puppy eyes and Luke is struck with the sudden urge to hug him or punch Michael. Before he can do anything, Calum makes a loud remark of ‘Here, have something to drink with that’ before dumping his glass of juice on the floor along with the spaghetti mess.  
By now, the whole cafeteria is laughing. Luke knows he should do something; say something but he’s frozen to the spot. He can sense Ashton staring at him but he’s too cowardly to even meet the older boy’s eyes. And when Calum and Michael look at him expectantly, he’s forced to cough up a laugh just to satisfy them.

His heart seems to literally break when Ashton gets up and runs out of the cafeteria. Calum and Michael are still laughing and when Michael makes a remark about Ashton being a ‘wimpy fag’, Luke loses it. The next thing that’s happening, he’s on top of Calum and punching the shit out of him. Calum tries to struggle but Luke has him pinned down and doesn’t relent with his blows until Calum’s face is red and swollen and Luke’s knuckles are badly bruised. When a teacher tries to pull him off Calum with a shout, Luke just pushes her away before tearing off the batman armband that Calum had given him when they first became friends and flinging it at the tanned boy lying on the floor before storming out of the cafeteria and the school.

No matter how hard Luke tries, Ashton is nowhere to be found. He’s not at his house or the library or anywhere else that Luke knows the curly-haired boy usually stays. Luke searches everywhere in town with no luck until he realises the one spot that he hasn’t checked and that is the lake where they shared their first kiss. Luke doubts Ashton would be here as Luke is probably the last person he wants to be reminded of but he decided to try anyways.

The first thing he notices is Ashton on the boardwalk one moment and the next, he isn’t. Luke doesn’t think twice before jumping into the lake after him. Luke hasn’t swum competitively in years but he holds his breath and dives to the bottom of the lake to wrap his arm around Ashton’s waist and try to pull him up to the surface. Ashton struggles at first and lashes out against Luke before seeming to give up and allow Luke to swim up with him.

Luke doesn’t get the chance to say anything when they’re finally back on the boardwalk. Ashton just stares at him with sad eyes and says, ‘’Why did you do that? Why couldn’t you leave me alone to die?’’

‘’I’m sorry.’’ Luke finally opens his mouth and says. ‘’I know I’m an idiot. I messed up big time and I allowed those jerks do that to you without doing anything to stop them. I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness but I like you. I really do. You’re the most amazing person I know. You’re weird and cute and clumsy and adorable and you’ve got such a big heart. I probably screwed up any chance of you ever liking me when I did that but please. I’m not going to stop trying to make it up to you.’’

Ashton is quiet for a moment then he sighs, ‘’Luke, Im not mad at you. I just felt so upset when you didn’t say anything and I guess I let my emotions get the best of me and I expected too much. I’m the idiot.’’

‘’No you aren’t.’’ The words are bitter in Luke’s mouth. ‘’You weren’t expecting too much. I was just a jerk and too much of a coward to say anything against them. Not anymore. Ashton, you’re the only person in that school that I actually like and who liked me back as a person and now, I doubt you’d want to be my friend much less my boyfriend.’’

‘’I would.’’ Ashton’s eyes are suspiciously bright. ‘’I would want to be your boyfriend. The only reason I was so hurt was because I do like you. I like you a lot.’’

Luke’s breath hitched, ‘’So you’ll give me a second chance?’’

‘’Yes,’’ Ashton breathes out. ‘’Can I trust you to not hurt me a second time?’’

‘’Yes, fuck yes.’’ Luke says loudly. They’re sitting cross legged next to each other with their clothes still dripping wet and its freezing as it’s starting to get cold out. Luke moves closer to Ashton, at least they can share warmth. I’ll never let anyone hurt you again. Especially not Michael or Calum. I promise.’’

‘’Thanks Luke,’’ Ashton says softly as their knees bump. ‘’You really are a nice guy.’’

No I’m not. Luke thinks but doesn’t say anything. Instead, he just holds unto Ashton’s hand and let their fingers intertwine silently.  
*  
The next day, Luke goes to pick up Ashton at his house before school. He doesn’t bother to go to football practice. He gave his jersey back to coach and resigned from the team after he realized that he really didn’t like soccer. 

Luke makes sure to get to school when everyone is already there and holds Ashton’s hand as they walk into the hallway, sending warning looks at anyone who seems like they’re going to say anything to him and Ashton. To his surprise, no one does. Everyone just carries on like normal. By the time Luke gets to first period which he has with Calum, he expects the boy to either ignore him or try to make his life a misery. Calum surprises him and ends up doing none of those two.

‘’Hey dude,’’ Calum comes up to Luke and says with a serious look on his face. His bruises from the beating that Luke gave him before are now a bright purple and obvious but Luke doesn’t feel much sympathy for Calum. He brought it up on himself after all. ‘’I just wanted to say that I’m sorry, we’re sorry.’’

‘’What?’’ Luke raises an eyebrow.

‘’For , you know,’’ Calum makes a waving motion with his hands. ‘’We didn’t know you liked Irwin. We wouldn’t have done that if you told us.’’

‘’You shouldn’t have done it either way.’’ Luke says frostily.

Calum winces, ‘’Yeah, you’re right. I just wanted to ask you to come back to the team and be my best bro again. We won’t do anything to your boyfriend. I promise.’’

‘’Sorry Calum but I can’t hang out with you anymore,’’ Luke eventually replies. ‘’You acted horribly.’’

‘’I know, I’m sorry. Please?’’ Calum’s puppy dog eyes go all huge and Luke has never really had any defence against those. He gives a sigh.

‘’You have to apologize to Ashton and if he can’t forgive you then we can’t be friends okay?’’ Luke eventually says. Calum nods as Luke continues. ‘’And you better be fucking nice to him. If you do shit to him and I find out, trust me when I say I will, I won’t hesitate to kill you.’’

Calum nods again, looking bashful before sliding into the seat next to Luke. Luke moves over with a grumble about Calum’s fat ass and all of a sudden, the two of them are laughing together.  
Just like Luke predicted, Ashton ends up forgiving both Calum and Michael really easily but what does surprise him is Michael and Ashton becoming close friends. When Ashton isn’t being shy, he’s an extremely loud and funny person and Michael ends up liking him. Michael soon takes Ashton’s siblings Lauren and Harry under his wing to become his punk-rock mini-me’s and everything turns out to be sort of alright after all.

**Author's Note:**

> dont forget to leave kudos and comments and look out for the next oneshot ;)


End file.
